Helping kids on social learning behavioural skills in pandemic

Childhood is an important time in the life of an individual, during which rapid physical, psychological, and social emotional growth occurs. Social learning behavioral skills includes a wide range of abilities that allow humans to interact and communicate with others. Children learn how to behave and solve social situations by predicting and understanding adult's behaviors.

Sometimes due to lack of proper guidance children exhibits common behaviors like noncompliance, poor social skills, disruptive behaviors such as temper tantrums, yelling, and hyperactivity. This kind of behavior is seen at home, in school and childcare settings as well.

Since March 2020, the entire world has faced the adverse effects of Coronavirus. The pandemic has brought about a huge disruption even in a child’s social life by limiting their main sources of interaction like school and play life. Children now can no longer attend their classes, share lunch or notes, or creating projects together. The lockdown during this pandemic has restricted a child’s interaction leaving it only to their immediate family members, relatives, and pets at home.

Parents and teachers can come together and collaborate to create a good environment for children who are at risk due to challenges in their behavior, social-emotional functioning, or learning skills. Steps could be taken by parents to help children feel safe, maintain healthy routines, manage their emotions and behavior and build resilience in order to strengthen their learning and development.

Here are a few do’s and don’ts for parents that can help them in guiding their children on social learning behavioral skills amid this pandemic:

Do’s for parents

• Plan everyday activities for the kids creatively. Let them learn to draw, paint, create art works, or use any musical instruments which can easily be worked on while staying at home. Make a habit of reading good story books and playing indoor board games as leisure activities.

• Use positive discipline. Children might not always be able to express how they are feeling during the pandemic and instead might end up acting out through their behavior. Hear them out if they had made a mistake or redirect bad behavior by finding something else for them to do. Use praise and rewards wisely to reinforce good behaviors like completing schoolwork, doing their chores, or getting along with siblings with the aim of developing self-discipline and compassion.

• Give effective instructions. If you want your child to follow your words, be direct and use clear commands. Be specific about why any behavior is helpful to you and to others. Guide your child to become aware of their positive behaviors and its benefits which in turn will encourage them to continue in similar ways in the future.

• Be a good role model for them with your manners. Children have always learned by watching how the adults in their life behave around situations. Model your child the behaviors you want to see in them. Observing you make helpful and healthy life choices and explaining why you make those choices can be a powerful learning tool for them.

• Teach your child “physical distancing” rather than “social distancing”. Your kids can get together with one or more peers to maintain their social network through video or WhatsApp calls or via texting through different social media platforms. Encourage them to maintain their bonds which will help in their social growth.

Don'ts for parents

• Do not recreate a typical school at your home. Even if there are some benefits to it, kids do not need to be taught all day. Lean into life skills like cooking or helping you in chores or engaging them in creative plays.

• Do not let your children spend a lot of time online, even though online platforms provide a chance for kids to learn and play. Increased access to online brings heightened risks for children’s safety, protection, and privacy. Discuss the pros and cons of the internet with your children so that they know how it works and what they need to be aware of.

• Do not take out your anger or frustration on your children. As many of you are working from home, it is quite common to displace your anger on the young ones for some small mistakes they made but it might lead to behavioral problems and modeling such behaviors.

• Do not stop your children from expressing their fears or anxiety on how they feel about the current pandemic. Ensure that they children interact with their peers, express themselves, use empathy when dealing with other’s concerns. Having a supporting relationship with adults and peers will go a long way toward helping them cope and having a healthy mindset.

School closure and loss of one complete academic year has undoubtedly created a big loss on children’s education but ignoring socio emotional learning and mental well-being could be a process for disaster in the long run. The coronavirus outbreak has brought huge disruptions in daily life and children are constantly adapting to these changes. It is important as parents who play a vital role in the child’s life to remind children about the positives and let them engage in social interactions while ensuring healthy conversation through online means. To conclude, I would like to say that it is essential to not only make sure that the child attends his/her class, but also cater to their social needs for them to grow in a holistic manner.

(Author Pranami Bordoloi is Clinical Psychologist at Kaleidoscope, a mental wellbeing unit of Dr. Bakshi's Healthcare. The views expressed are personal)