How do people grieve in Indonesia when they lose a loved one? 

Well, people grieve in different ways after they lose a loved one. In India, you would see the elder son shaving his head after the death of his father or a woman wearing white or simple clothes after losing her husband. But there is one tradition that is peculiar to the Dani tribe in Indonesia that you certainly wouldn’t have imagined someone doing after someone died. The Dani women have a severe way of dealing with their grief. They cut their finger.  

Ikipalin – the finger-cutting tradition  
Yes, you read it right. When a family in the Dani tribe of Indonesia loses a loved one, the top joint of the finger of a woman from that family is amputated. This spine-chilling tradition is called ‘Ikipalin’. This is their way of expressing the pain of mourning. 

But how do they do it? Do they just chop it off? Well, there is a set process for this too. A string is tightly tied around the finger until it goes numb. A family member, often a sibling or parent then cuts off the top of the finger. Then, to stop bleeding and prevent infection, the wound is either burnt or dressed with leaves treated with traditional herbs.  

But why do they do that? Well, it is a way to show the pain caused after the loss of a loved one. It is said that it also keeps the deceased person’s restless spirit away. 

A symbol of unity and strength 
Wondering why would they cut their finger and not any other part of their body? Well, an alternative Dani mourning custom involves cutting off an ear. But it is mostly fingers since the tribes see them as a symbol of harmony, unity and strength in a family. Though they may be of different lengths, they work together as a team to complete a task and therefore they are the true representation of a family.  

Infact, the Dani tribe also has a slightly less painful manner of expressing grief– they would smear their body with ashes and clay and refrain from bathing for several weeks. 

But is this self-destruction even allowed? No, not legally. Ikipalin has been banned by the Indonesian government but sadly, it is speculated that the ritual continues in secrecy. 

The Dani tribe at a glance 
The Dani tribe lives in the town of Wamena of the Jayawijaya Regency in Indonesia. They are one of the most populous tribes in the central highlands of western New Guinea.  

If you get a chance to visit this place someday, you could spot them wearing an unusual kind of underwear, called Koteka. Worn by males, it is commonly referred to as a penis sheath. Don’t get frightened but these people are also well known for their unique practice of self-mutilation. They have often been described as ‘Stone Age’ people. That is because when they were first found, the way they lived resembled how we imagine pre-historic man had once lived.