Parenting tips to make your child mentally agile

Shielding our kids from the less sunny parts of life makes them emotionally weak, and unable to tackle the complexities of adult life.  Here are some tips to build emotional agility in your child.  

Failures are the stepping stones to success 
A child who is never at fault would probably never learn anything. Bad grades don’t mean an evening of scolding, nor does it mean an evening of home treats to make up for the disappointment. Turn failures into learning experiences by getting your kid to face the situation, analyse it, and deal with it. Many high schoolers become suicidal from fear of failure. But your kid should be the one with a Plan B even when they fail.   

Self-motivation is better than rewards 
Is your child studying because you told her that you would reward her? Is she trying to excel at sports because she wants a gift? Dangling a carrot on the stick won’t lead them too far. Get your kid to understand that their achievements benefit them. A self-motivated teen will choose courses that he or she wants in high school, not what others want of them. And motivated young people are the ones that succeed.  

Comfort zones are not the best laces for growth  
You know your son is not great at grammar. Explain a lesson to him, help him with all the books and course material needed, and then let him write his own essay. If you keep doing it for him, he will create a comfortable corner in his mind, and never step out to explore. If your daughter hates Math, try gamified learning to make it fun. But her homework is to be done by her.  

Understanding points of view is the first step to empathy  
Mental agility training gives a lot of importance to empathy, analysis and clear communication. Actively encourage your kid to think from both sides of the table. The waitress spilled soup on your child’s new dress on a night out. What would she gain from it? Nothing. So perhaps it’s an accident, and telling her how clumsy she is won’t help. Asking her to be careful, politely, would work better. Teens need this training more since they are about to go out into the world soon.