Empathy, the most talked-about and the much-in-demand skill has suddenly emerged as an indispensable skill in the 21st century. With the pandemic causing a furore and reducing us all to our helpless self, there has been a sudden realization that we, the Millennials, Gen Z and Gen Alpha lack empathy in its true sense.
This real-life awakening has raised numerous questions, the prominent one being how have we failed. It calls for courage to admit that despite being educated, compassionate and socially responsible, we have rarely practised empathy in our lives. It like other skills can be nurtured or in simple words, acquired. The children and adults can learn how to be empathetic.
In order to do so, understanding the word in its true sense is a pre-requisite. Empathy is not just stepping into someone’s shoes and imagining or experiencing her/his emotions and feelings. Empathy triggers a positive response. The response need not necessarily be something monumental. A small gesture, a tiny idea to bring comfort, to make one feel better than the existing condition is enough.
The action that follows justifies empathy and gives a sense of fulfilment. It is not selective of circumstances, groups or specific people. It just spurts creating a strong desire to act in order to make something finer than what it is.
The crucial question is how can we teach empathy to our students, teachers and the ones who are at a higher level in hierarchy. My downrightness might not be appreciated by many but it echoes the thoughts of many who would agree that we need to walk the talk.
Let’s begin with the ones who hold a position and manage a team. An empathetic team leader connects with the team members and this motivates the team to give their best at all times.The team members are not intimidated by power or deadlines but are intrinsically motivated and feel accountable. It is straight from the heart, no pretence. Empathy knows no favouritism. One cannot feel empathy for selected people and indifference for others.
At times, to foresee the impact of an edict, or a decision and re-think, re-formulate is empathy. Gestures, words, actions say a lot.
It is necessary to emphasize here that kindness, empathy and compassion do not make anyone a taken for granted leader.
Instead, it makes one humane and judicious. For those who believe, empathy makes a leader indecisive or weak, let them be reminded that the world doesn’t need dictators but leaders who are prudent, socially responsible and accountable for their actions.
Teachers, mentors, facilitators were placed on a high pedestal, even till the past decade. A famous couplet by Saint Kabir Das, a 15th century Indian mystic poet- “Guru Gobind Dou Khade, Kake Lagoon Pai, Balihari Guru Aapno, Govind Diyo Batay” highlights the status enjoyed by the teachers. However, times have changed and responsibilities have expanded beyond limits.
The boundaries of a teacher’s role and approach have blurred. Be it soft skills, habits, ethics, integrity or etiquettes, a teacher is responsible for each and every aspect of a child’s personality. As rightly said, “A teacher affects eternity. He can never know where his influence stops.” If we want our future generations to be empathetic beings, we certainly have to groom them in an empathetic environment.
Children absorb everything from the environment. It is amazing to watch how their keen observation can see through all outward appearances.
Children may not remember what is taught but they will always remember how you made them feel. The silent language of acceptance, compassion and empathy can break through all barriers.
Therefore, it’s crucial that teachers are empathetic beings. One cannot walk into a classroom and become empathetic towards children while having an entirely different way of dealing with co-workers and other people. Needless to reiterate, training sessions can be of a great help in creating an empathetic work- force. Children are the most vibrant, enigmatic and receptive layer of this pyramid. What they observe, they feel and they learn shapes their very existence.
With so much talent and an insatiable hunger for success, children have this desire to prove themselves, achieve their goal and feel accepted. Empathy will prevent them from becoming ruthless in the long run. Contentment, fulfilment, happiness will be their constant companion if they have compassion and empathy.
Dr. Anjali Sharma, academic coordinator, The HDFC School, Gurugram. Views expressed are personal.