Teach your daughter to identify a potential sexual threat

Recently, Bombay High Court’s judge, Justice Pushpa V Ganediwala found herself in troubled waters over some controversial statements she made in January 2020 in regard to POCSO (Protection of Children from Sexual Offences) cases. She first shocked many by acquitting a 39-year-old man by maintaining that pressing breasts of a minor without removing her top did not entail skin-to-skin contact. So, according to Ganediwala’s judgement, it does not count as a POCSO Act offence. The second ruling was made just 9 days after in regards to a similar case. Here, she acquitted a 50-year-old man by ruling that holding hand of a five-year old and unzipping his pants in front of her cannot be ruled as a sexual offence. Her verdicts have resulted in the Centre and the Supreme court denying her the position of a permanent judge or an elevation to the High Court where she worked temporarily. In a world that has become extremely unsafe for girls, it is crucial to teach your daughter how to identify sexual threats. Here is what you can do to protect her. 

Ensure that your daughter knows her personal space 
Many times, harassment is brushed off just because it does not involve physical touch. Explain to your daughter that even an uncomfortable stare, gesture or someone standing too close to her when there is plenty of room around is wrong. She must know that any conscious action carried out with the intent of threatening or making one feel uncomfortable is a harassment, even if it doesn’t involve touching.  

Help her differentiate between banter and uncomfortable sexual jokes 
Banter is fun, light-hearted and makes one laugh without feeling uncomfortable. On the other hand, sexual jokes purposefully cracked with the wrong intent make one uncomfortable. However, the claim that it was just a “light-hearted” joke gives harassers the chance to get away with it. If a joke makes your daughter uncomfortable and threatened, suggest that she informs you.  

Tell her to take precautions online 
Unfortunately, sexual harassment is rampant online too. What makes it worse is that most times, parents do not have access to their child’s life on the internet. Stalking, sending unsolicited images, creepy messages, etc. are all examples of harassment too. If she is being stalked, ask her to inform you immediately before the stalking transfers to the real world. Encourage your daughter to report and block such profiles on social media, and not interact with them either. 

Ask your daughter to trust her gut 
More often than not, sexual offences do not get reported because the victim does not believe that she was harassed. This can be due to a psychological defence mechanism subconsciously put in place to not feel victimised or weak. High chances are that if a victim is uncomfortable in a certain situation, there is a culprit who made her feel like that. Ask her to trust her gut and assure her that she has full freedom to inform you and you will definitely trust her.